the Rainy Day-Wich

This spring has been particularly gloomy. Which is nice because everything is green and today i have the day off. And what could go better with a rainy day off than a grilled cheese done Pearl style? Nothing.

I ♥ Grilled cheese. Sometimes more than i love my kitty. Is that wrong?

i made mine with some lacy swiss, caramelized vidalia onions (which are in season! hip! hip!) and fig jam. oooohhhh baby. the trick is spreading both sides with the Golden fig jam, so the cheese sticks (to both sides!) then putting the hot onions in the middle THEN grilling it. Double whammy melty awesomeness. ya dig?

happy days!



Smoked Salmon Toasts

Smoked Salmon Toasts with Dill and Capers:

1 package of your favorite sliced Smoked Salmon (we used New York Style)

8 oz tub of cream cheese

½ a shallot (approx. 2 tablespoons)

1 T. Chopped Dill (plus extra for garnish)

¼ teaspoon Garlic Powder

½ teaspoon Black Pepper

¼ c. Capers

One Baguette OR a box of your favorite sturdiest crackers

This is the easiest thing to do. Ever. Go ahead preheat an oven to 400 degrees.

Slice the baguette into thin toasts

Line the baking sheet and pop it in the oven for about 5 minutes or until golden brown. (Note* Be sure to keep an eye on them or they’ll char up faster than  citizens of Pompeii)

Take out and place them on a cooling rack.  By the time they cool they’ll have a lovely crunch.

Take the cream cheese.  Pour it into a bigger bowl, unless you have the delicate finesse for mixing it in the actual tub.  In which case. Well Done, You!

Combine the finely minced shallot, dill, garlic, and pepper in the cream cheese. Mix vigorously. This will not only equally distribute the delicious bits, but also “warm up” the mix to a perfect “Spreadability”.  Yes. That is an official cooking term.

Now it’s assembly time! Take a cool toast. Spread it with a bit of the cream cheese mixture. Top with a piece of salmon. Garnish with some of the reserved dill and 3-4 capers right on top.  Put in your mouth. This is crucial. Have the first taste.  Adjust as necessary. My mother always said, “You can always add, you can never take away”.

If it’s delicious, press on and fill the plate with them. You might have some extra toasts. This is ok. Use them for Bruschetta. Jam and Brie. Or croutons.

The Epic of that Most Decadent Wednesday

Let’s set the Scene, shall we?

We had only 3 days left until our lives would change FOREEEEEVVEEERRRrrrrrr!!!!!!!!! We were Graduating College. Yikes!

“Ok, no, don’t panic! We can do this…right?”

Then we looked at the facts. And the facts were these-

Did we have a Life plan? Nope.

Job offers? Negative.

Any semblance of Direction? Nada.

Student Loans? Hoho! You betcha. (damn).

But SO, what? Let’s celebrate our absolute befuddlement and throw ourselves One Giant Feast! Yes. Before Life and her collectors come a knockin’, we’ll go out with a bang of idealism and denial via gluttonous overload. Totally Worth it.

Here at The Pearl, we like things classy. we like things special. but above all, we need things delicious. We do things right. So the Menu had to be rather extraordinary. Which brings us to,

Le Menu:

Drinkables :

Sweet tea bourbon cocktails with mint and blood oranges.


Frisee Salad with Pomegranate seeds, Avocado and Grapefruit.

Baked Goat Brie with Dried Sour Cherries

Prosciutto wrapped Melon

Smoked Salmon with Capers and Dill

Balsamic Bruschetta on Garlic Crostini

Endives with a Walnut, Bleu Cheese, Apple, Bacon salad.

 Cake with Strawberries and Cream

(We told you we weren’t messing around)

The day of we had a fabulous shopping experience at Whole Foods (where Megan works) and came home and started prepping, both with the cocktails and with the cutting, dicing, toasting, etc. It was great because then that night all we had to do was assemble the hors d’oeuvres, assemble ourselves, and tuck in!

In a word, the meal was Transcendent. The flavors, the company, the music; everything! We wouldn’t have wanted to make our graceful exit out of the University Circuit any other way.

Celebrations are our favorite. Not only because they are a way to acknowledge how hard we worked, how grateful we are to be done, and to prepare us for what’s to come; but they also are wonderful moments of reflection, of peace, of fun, and of pleasure that we don’t get as often as we should. (this is a Universal observation—People of the World, CELEBRATE MORE!)

After dinner we wanted to see a movie and have dessert at the drive-in, but it was closed. So instead we came home and put on our graduation robes, pretended we were wizards and abused the heck out of PhotoBooth. What, what! We’s got degree’s y’all.

And there it is. The best, the brightest, and the future. Oh dear.

a healthy dose of Blaspheme…

 My Holy Trinity consists of: Katharine Hepburn. Jimmy Stewart. and Cary Grant.
Supplement these handsome devils with Pretension and Champagne and (Oh lord, forgive me, but its true) i’m the happiest girl on earth!
All can be found in one glorious gay romp: The Philadelphia Story
And you best believe that, “Philadelphia Story is the greatest film of all time!”
some of you will consider this hyperbole. some of you are dumb-dumbs. don’t be like that. go get yo’ self an education.
Ok, ok, I’ll compromise. It at least makes the top 10 list of “Man’s greatest creations” agreed? good.
Here are the facts: it has everything–killer cast, killer story, killer style, killer direction, AND killer whales ( in the pool scene).
it’s the bee’s knees. so if you haven’t seen it–shame on you. if you have–watch it again.
Pour yourself a cup of scotch and put on your fanciest evening dress JUST to watch this movie. Totally worth it. Totally not weird.
What is weird is that this is the same routine I’d follow if I were watching Sunset Boulevard. It happens….
So God Bless you, George Cuckor. Amen.

Need, Plan, Practicality: a survivors guide

    1. Need

i.     Before presenting a policy, you must establish that a current problem exists and relates to your audience

  1. (zombies! We’re gonna die!)

ii.     Explain the problem

iii.     How it effects the population

iv.     Dangers if not fixed

  1. I should not have to explain why a zombie apocalypse is the WORST possible situation to be in. they are unstoppable. They are hungry. And contrary to popular belief, I believe zombies cloak themselves in handsomeness. They don’t look like Sophia Loren. They look like Alec Baldwin in a tailored suit. Phenomenal.
  2. Plan

i.     This is the hardest part. Everyone has a friggin’ opinion:

  1. “We should stand and fight!”
  2. “We should run and hide!”
  3. “We should make-out!”

ii.     A plan should solve the problem with logic. And finesse.

  1. Explain your plan
    1. We should build a bunker and kidnap a scientist so he can mutate our genes so that we might become immune to zombie venom
    2. State who shall enforce this plan
      1. The prettiest person in the room will be in charge. Just to switch it up
    3. Discuss funding
      1. Magazine drive
  2. Practicality

i.     Cure

  1. Will this plan absolve us of a zombie problem entirely?

ii.     Advantages vs. Disadvantages

  1. What is worse? living underground eating nothing but corn chips in the hopes of survival? Or being gang banged by a group of hungry zombies

iii.     Counterarguments

  1. You might say guns are the answer to fighting off a zombie attack, but try finding a responsible medic under times of duress should you misfire on your own face.  You can’t.
  2. Problem-Solution

i.     Zombies: Anti-Zombie Venom

  1. Problem-Cause-Solution

i.     Zombies: Global Warming: anti-Zombie Venom

  1. As always, speeches need a Intro, Body and Conclusion

i.     Best of luck, survivors…

Pearls are Spit.

A most wonderful pleasure is finding something precious within something mundane. Like a Pearl.

DID YOU KNOW THAT a pearl is just a hard rock of spit from a mollusk? poetic, i know. But it’s true. They’re just hawked-up loogies with a lustre. gross.

And yet, Pearls are beautiful. They are elegant. refined. poised. And still a little gritty when you rub them against your teeth to check for authenticity.(more on this later). The point–if i may–is that all darling things come from the spit glands of shellfish. Metaphorically speaking. My lesson is learning to embrace it.

Salutations! It’s Pearl Time!

 hi. we’re glad you’re here.

here’s our story. via equation:

2 grls+Room[ates]xCsU-$+bourbon/boys^10th=awesome. hungry. happy. thirsty. workin girls.

This is a place where finding good things is as easy as looking in simple places. Our Pearls [if you will, which you MUST] all involve good food, good drink, funnies, movies, music, shenanigans, flowers, and God knows what else. Oh boy, guess we’ll find out together. C’mon now. this is happening. Welcome!